ice.

is not really my friend. we had a little encounter earlier. let my set you up for this story. the weather is bad. it's cold, and rainy, and icy. it has rained most of the day. keep that in mind.

so i'm on my way to the dinning commons, and trying to plan the safest, no fall, route. i make it down the hill in front of our house, cross the street, and decide to take the stairs down to the sidewalk. to get to these stairs you have to step up a foot and a half or so. without thinking about the results of the cold weather and the rain i stepped up onto the top step like i always do. and with one fell swoop my foot is out from underneath me, i'm falling on my hip, and trying not to fall down the remaining five steps, or off the back to the alley. what a lovely thing to do before dinner. so... now i've got a bruise on my arm, probably my hip, and probably my ankle (from where my foot hit the bottom of the hand rail). all in all, lovely.

freezing my tootsies off here.
- corrie

homework avoidance.

well... thanksgiving break is over and it's back to the daily grind of classes, and homework. well i guess in reality i never really had an official break from homework. i did take two days of not doing any, but i should have. well, at least one of them.

yesterday was a great day. what did i do? pretty much nothing. i slept in late, and then read all day. the only time i stopped was to eat dinner, use the potty a few times, and while i was working on my laundry late at night. overally it was pure bliss. there is nothing like reading a good novel all day. on friday when i went shopping (not to the places with all the crazy people, but shopping none the less) i ran by barnes and noble, and as i headed in i remembered that the third book in a series that i enjoy recently came out, so i picked it up. that is the one i read all day yesterday. not only did i read it all day but i finished it this morning when i woke up. not too shabby if you ask me. i may go back through and read it if i have time, but i'm not sure i'll have time.

so... now i'm back on campus with nothing to do but homework, and i really don't want to do my homework, no matter how much i need to. i have this silly cor401 presentation on wednesday, and i need to finish putting together the final document, and figure out what i'm going to say. all before i go to bed tonight. like i said, i really don't want to do it, but i need to do it for the rest of my group. gar! oh well, at least after wednesday it will all be over. that's such a relief.

well, i really should go now. this is just something to waste time. blah. i hate having to do homework. in may i'll be done. at least with this type.

shame on me.
- corrie

mmmbop.

tonight was so much fun. it is my last night in greenville before thanksgiving break, and i took a night for me, and had a blast. my friend katie's boyfriend, brad who is also my friend, is on our schools basketball game, and they played tonight at mckindree (spelling? i don't know, i don't go there). it's only about 40 minutes away so she, our friend alyssa, and myself went to watch the guys play.

the guys lost pretty bad, but we had a really great time. i had a brief moment during the game where my stomach was in knots, good ones, that had nothing to do with the game. on the way back we listened to music and rocked out. i picked to listen to hanson, their first album. boy did it take me back. it was so much fun. i still remembered all of the lyrics to mmmbop, and somehow remembered some of the other lyrics too. i think i need to get that album on my ipod for old times sake. good times, good times.

then later we came back to my house (where alyssa lives too), and we hung out and listened to christmas music, and talked while i cleaned my room for leaving. today was a great last night before break. too bad i have a lot of school work to do over break. blah. oh well. i'll survive.

plant a seed, plant a flower, plant a rose.
- corrie

questions. hard ones.

sometimes i wonder: if someone doesn't want to invest the time in me, why should i invest the time in them? if my friendship isn't work seeking me out sometimes (even once a month), why should i seek our theirs? i know that my friendship makes a difference in some peoples lives, but... why should i be doing all the moving and taking all the steps? come to me for once, for goodness sake!

sporks.

today was an enjoyable day. i didn't actually do anything, which is i think what made it so appealing to me. recently i've been more social, and out of the house than i typically go for, so today i stayed home almost all day.

so... today. i didn't actually go to bed until almost 3am so i slept in quite late. i honestly don't remember the last time i slept as late as i did today. it was so late i'm slightly embarassed to say how late it was, so i won't. but it was late. then i did a little work on cor401. i emailed 5 of my 6 other group members. i didn't email the 6th because he itsn't supposed to send me anything. although, i did almost email him more as a joke than anything. that may still be funny if done right. hmm... something to ponder. so then i spent the rest of the day either on my computer, watching tv, or listening to music. sometimes 2 of the 3 at the same time. not too bad really. the only time i left was to go and get dinner (which ended up being from kfc/taco bell, but was actually kfc food).

now i'm sitting here, writing this, listening to john mayer and danielson. my own little new music mix. last week i realized that i didn't have john mayer's 3rd album and needed to fix that, so i did. then last night i got the new danielson album "ships." it's different and good. i'd heard about him (real name daniel smith) a while ago, and sort of listened but didn't take note. then i read an article about him in a magazine last night, and decided to get it. so i did.

well i'm going to go watch more tv now. or will i spend more time listening to music? or farting around on the internet? not sure yet.

it's fun to draw on and take pictures of sporks.
- corrie

i'm so done.

with the whole school and classes and projects and papers thing that is. i am sick of it all! it's not that there aren't parts of it that i enjoy, i like some of my group members and sometimes class is really fun, but really need a break. for instance, i have a paper that is due at 2:30 today. it's 11:50 now. i don't want to do it. it's not that it's going to be difficult to write, i'm actually a great paper writer especially for prof ross classes, but i'm just sick of doing it. thankfully i have tomorrow off, more or less. i have one meeting but it shouldn't be too bad. and i should probably do some reading or start on another of the 2 papers i have due next week, but we'll see about that.

i'm also looking forward to thanksgiving break. i'm going to my aunt and uncles in st. louis, which should be nice spending the holiday with family. the only things that i've got on my mind concerning that are 1. i'm going to be in st. louis and want to do things, but don't really have anyone to do stuff with, which is a bummer, and 2. i have a huge presentation two weeks from today and we are so far from done and thanksgiving takes a whole week of prep away from us. that makes me nervous.

well i'm going to go now. paper to write you know. blech.

i hope today ends up being half as good as yesterday.
- corrie

torn.

as i sit here on my bed, having recently awoken from a nap, my mind is rolling on and on. here is what i'm thinking.

1. i'm looking at imdb.com (a site i frequent daily) and saw adverts for the new brad pitt movie babel. it looks really good and i want to see it. i think it came out today. somehow it reminded me of my dilema about the 17th of this month. on that day happy feet and casino royale (the new james bond movie) open. a friend and i have already made plans to go and see happy feet and i will see that through, but i really would like to go and see casino royale too. i'm afraid that if i don't go and see it when it opens that i'll have to wait until it comes out on dvd. and in case you were wondering, i do like the james bond movies. something not many know i believe.

2. i really need a new journal. at the beginning of this week i looked at and counted how many pages i had left and thought that it was more than enough to get me through, but now i'm cutting it close. in the last four days i've averaged writing 8 pages a day, and i've already written more than i did last week. i'm going to leave soon and go get it. hope i can find a fantastic one.

3. tonight is looking to be a lot of fun and i'm looking forward to it. we are having a girls night down in some of my friends place in college ave. i've been wanting to do something like this for a long time, but no one has really latched onto the idea until now. so i'm planning it (more or less), and i think that i'm actually going to be the only person there who doesn't actually live there. oh well, it'll be a blast with some awesome ladies.

4. lastly, i'm convinced that some people only keep me around because i make them laugh. it's not a bad thing, i actually like to make people laugh, but i do wonder if i wasn't as funny as i am if we would still hang out as much as we do. just a thought.

well, i'm off to get things done and get ready for tonight. it's going to be a lot of fun and hopefully take my mind off of a few things.

no chances to take today.
- corrie

the sound of white.

things that i am coming to realize about myself:
- i am great at having one on one conversations with people. i love to go out to dinner or to coffee with someone and have a great conversation. small groups work too, but one on one is where i thrive.
- i am an encourager. i find myself continually encouraging people. whether it be on a lesson that they are giving, or a test they are studying for, or even a nap they are taking, i always wish them the best on it. with that i'm trying to be good at following it up later by asking how it went.
- i am still the same person i've always been. how so? mostly with friends. it took me a long time to figure things out with the whole friendship thing, and even though i am more secure in it now than i used to be, i still have similar tendencies that i think are left over from it. i bounce from group to group, and have this feeling of never quite getting into one group all the way because of all the bouncing that i do, or the late entry into a group of friends. like now i have 4 places that i hang out, with 3 different groups of people. 1. tower apartments. 2. college ave pod 201. 3. my house downstairs. 4. my house upstairs in my room. it still interests me how little i have actually changed over the years.

things i'm working on:
- i am trying to take more chances. they tend to relate to one part of my life but i feel like the chances i take in that part carry over into other parts. it's really been the last few days that i've been working on it and i've done well so far. however, i feel a point approaching where i'll have made the effort so much that i'll have to stop because i can't do all the work.

other:
- i have lots of things that i want to happen in my life. i almost always wonder when those things are going to happen. i feel them approaching, but i'm still not confident enough in those feelings to know if they are true or that something will happen.
- i have also begun to ask this question to some of the ladies that i hang out with: when did it become a bad thing to be girly? i mean really. when did it? when i act girly about some issues i feel stupid, but i'm not actually being stupid, i'm embracing who i am and how i think. i'm not the only one either. i've experienced other friends feeling lame/stupid for acting girly since i began to ask this question. and it's not a point of when being girly is stupid (over analyzing and such), but at what point in life did it become bad/stupid to be girly? i don't have an answer, but i'm actively looking and asking whenever it pops into my head.
- i'm currently enjoying listening to missy higgins. i put her in the cd player in my truck yesterday, and i've felt like listening to her music ever since. must relate to how i'm feeling/ what i'm going through at this time. or some other reason along those lines.

i really need to go to bed now. i'm tired, and it's getting late. blah. thankfully classes tomorrow should be easy, and then my week is almost over. hope tomorrow is at least half as good as the last two days. if it is then it'll be another great day.

i don't know what to expect next. and on some level i'm okay with that.
- corrie

a first!

lately i've been overwhelmed by all the relationships and engagements and weddings on the horizon, and to an extent i still am. it has been bothering me less lately, as i'm getting used to the new ones that have arisen, and no more new ones have popped up in a few weeks.

i like going to weddings, and i've been planning to go to two this summer. weddings are enjoyable events (more so when you aren't expected to bring a "guest" which is another topic all together, and i want to keep this post happy so i won't even get started on it), but lately i've been saying this phrase a lot: "always a guest never even a bridesmaid." which is 100% true. to date i have never been in anyone's wedding. i have friends who have been in a ton of weddings but never me. today that changed. my good friend mandi got engaged 3 weeks ago, and today she asked christine and myself to be in her wedding. i am super excited! i hadn't exactly been expecting it, so it was a nice surprise. i will be one of nine bridesmaids (so many!), and will be wearing a pink dress, and that's pretty much all i know for now. it's going to be a blast though.

could a more of a change be coming soon?
- corrie

time alone.

i have been super busy (for me that is) over the last couple of days. i would even say that i was stressed out, and it takes a lot for me to get that way. after 2:30 today i was much more relaxed. (note: 2:30 is when i finished a paper that was due in my 2:30 class. i'm good at stuff like that.)

funny moment from my day:
i walk into com seminar (2:30 class) a few minutes late, and i see that everyone has a piece of candy and is looking at a blue sheet of paper. i go to prof ross and she tells me to pick my favorite candy. my choices were hershey milk chocolate, krackel, mr. goodbar, or dark chocolate. i, of course, choose a krackel, and then she gives me my own sheet of blue paper. what i had just take was the candy test. it is another personality sorter (we've done a ton in that class), but possibly the most fun and telling of all. what does krackel say about me? check this out: messy but organized; creative, optimistic, perky, visual learners and teachers. sees the cup as half-full always, a little offbeat and crazy, entrepreneurial and friendly. doesn't mind chaos and able to multi-task. can fly by the seat of their pants and improvise. sometimes needs a deadline to get the task done. me me me me me! funny huh?

best part of my day:
i offered to take my friend maribeth to the airport so she could go home for her brother's wedding this weekend. we had a super enjoyable drive there, and made good time (which was good because we left 45 minutes later than we had planned!). on the way back, however, i was all alone. that turned out to be a huge blessing. i was able to call my mom and talk with her for a while. that is we had an actual conversation, not a "mom's calling me again so i have to talk to her." then i was able to rock out to brandtson (favorite band at the moment) and be alone. it was so nice and relaxing, something that i probably would have done if i was at home and needed to relax. i also made a phone call to a friend. she didn't answer but at least she knows i'm thinking of her. and to think, none of this would have happened if i had gone through with my plan to ask someone to ride with me. i was willing to take a chance, but it wasn't meant to be. good thing too.

sleepy time, at a decent hour!
- corrie