burp.

i keep burping. wanna know why? well, let me tell you a story.

it all began on an innocent sunday afternoon at eastminster presbyterian church in ventura, california. six leaders and four kids gathered for epc middle school fear factor. and it was all down hill from there.

two leaders led the games while everyone else divided into teams. it ended up being guys vs gals, the rematch. the gals took the guys last week in the digital camera scavenger hunt.

the first activity was the jello taste test. it was lime jello with something different added to each one, that the blindfolded contestant would need to identify. the first was garlic, the second was bacon (i got that one), the third was tuna, and the fourth and final was chocolate chip cookies. gross but not too bad. (last time i got lime jello with ranch dressing. that was worse than bacon.) the teams were tied after this event. 2-2.

the second activity was a timed event in which each team would dig through a box of crickets and branches to find keys that correspond to a different bike lock. once all locks were opened tri-tip the stuffed cow would be free. the guys time was quicker here (only by like 40 seconds) so they took this event. 5-2 guys.

the third activity was by far the worst - we drank milk shakes. but not normal milk shakes, "specialized" milk shakes. the leaders in charge had 8 ingredients and each ingredient had a corresponding number. both teams picked 4 numbers and got the ingredients that went with them. the guys team ended up with pickled cactus, canned spinach, a stick of butter, and spam. the gals team got chocolate chip cookie dough, coconut shavings, velveeta cheese, and sardines. we appeared to have the raw end of the deal (pun fully intended), but decided to go first. i have to honestly say that it wasn't too bad. gross yes, but thankfully the cookie dough overpowered the sardines while we were drinking. it was the aftertaste that did the majority of us in. my mom, sarah, and myself all drank our portion of the shake with natalie the only one to not finish it. refunding did occur. the guys came next and, surprisingly, theirs was worse and no one finished. i couldn't even watch them, because they were all gagging and refunding. i still cringe at the thought. so the gals took that game by a huge margin and were now in the lead. 8-5 gals.

the fourth and final event was more mental and much easier on the stomach. we had to solve this puzzle. four of the five pieces made a square but you had to figure out how to incorporate the fifth piece to make it into a square. it was difficult, and made gross by the fact that the pieces were covered and needed to be worked with on lard. yep, lard. it wasn't pleasant but i'd rather have done that than drink another shake. we weren't going anywhere, but after a couple of hints the gals team pulled it through (sarah got it in the end) and won. the gals increased their lead with this game. 12-5 gals.

that means that the ladies team won and we got a "million dollar prize." it was a package of 10 100 grand candy bars. get it a million dollars?

overall a good and sickening time. it's been about 3 hours since i drank the shake and i'm STILL burping and feeling a little gross. i've never done anything like that before and don't plan on it again. i am proud of myself for doing it though.

epc girls kick butt.
- corrie

what the?

i just spent the last 30 minutes watching from justin to kelly. yes, i was just watching what is possibly the worst movie ever made. okay, maybe not worst but cheesiest in a serious way. the biggest thought about it that i had was poor kelly clarkson. i like kelly clarkson but this is just sad. thank goodness her career wasn't tainted by this horrible of a film. however, the movie glitter comes to mind and mariah carey recovered from something even that bad, so yea. anyway, i just turned off the movie and said to myself, "wait, why am i watching this?!" so bad. so bad.

okay, i'm done. i'm going to coffee now with liz. should be great.

i love coffee.
- corrie

ouch.

sometimes the things that make you happy can also hurt you. example. yesterday i had an extremely enjoyable time on the lazy river at lake casitas, however, when i returned home i realized that i had gotten sunburned. bad. i mean, it's not too bad, but it's the worst burn i've had in quite a while. it's basically my whole back and shoulders and upper arms. a little on my face, but not really. so, yea, now i'm saying ouch a lot. like when i'm wearing a tank top and put my bag on my shoulder. my hope is that i recover quickly and it turns into a lovely tan. oh, and that it doesn't blister. that would suck.

today i went to the beach for the first real time. it was wonderful. i found my old rash guard to protect my back and shoulders (and so i wouldn't have to apply sunscreen to those areas). it was overcast, but 80 degrees down by the water, and the water itself was, well, not warm, but not freezing either. it felt fantastic. my mom even went in. it had been ages since she'd gone in the ocean. i wish we'd stayed in longer but the kids who we brought wanted to just play on the beach more than be in the water. overall, a very good time, and i didn't get any additional burns.

hurting, but happy.
- corrie

hot hot hot.

heat. yes, it is hot here. too hot. and not just hot, but humid too. this is southern california, it's not supposed to be this humid. at the beginning of the month i wrote about how i was enjoying the warm evenings, and how the heat felt good. i retract that statement. it was fine then, when it was dry heat, but it no longer does anything for me. aside, that is, from make me sweat. i've sweated enough. i'm through. give me my 65 degree evenings, and 75 degree days. oh how i miss our usual weather. my mom has compared this summer to the summer that she was pregnant with me, and how miserable she was in the heat. i don't really have anything to compare it to, save maybe last august when i moved into school.

speaking of which, that time is fast approaching. it's odd that i'm already talking about when i'm going to be going back to school. i'm counting down my final weeks, and boy are they busy. i've still got 3 more weeks with the kids, one off (but i'll be busy visiting people one last time), and then another half week before i leave for the 3 day journey to the midwest. joy. i'm having mixed emotions about going back at the moment. i'm looking forward to aspects of it, but starting classes isn't one of them. this semester is going to be brutal. i will think of it no longer until i must buy my books. cringe. that'll be through the roof.

i think that's all. and as usual it ended up being more than i anticipated.

ready for winter. (sorta)
- corrie

happy things.

so, i've gone around the last 10 or so minutes and taken pictures of the things that are currently/have recently made me happy. here they are, with a brief description of each. enjoy.

this is a picture of sarah and justin that was taken during christmas break. i have just completed my first of four weeks watching them this summer, and am enjoying it. in the last year that i've been gone they've turned into little brats, but hopefully over the next 5 weeks i can mush it out of them. no matter what i do love them, and are the closest things i have to little siblings.

this is the lazy river at the lake casitas water park near ojai. i went there for the first time on wednesday with the little brats (see above). it was such a good time. all we did for two hours was float/swim around this river. we all got along fantastically, and had a lot of fun splashing and floating around. i could probably go up there every day for the rest of summer and not complain one bit. i think i'll take the kids 2 times next week.

these are some starting to look sad sunflowers that are in a beautiful vase that my grandmother bought me. i got them last saturday, and then forgot to water them the last couple of days, but they are still beautiful. every time i look over to the corner of the room that they are in i smile.

these are the two most recent books that i read and each of them were great reads. i looked forward to reading them every day (more like every night), and they have really made me look at myself in a new, possibly more critical (but in a good way), light. i would recommend either of them to you.

this is a picture of my new journal, and i almost couldn't get it up here. (silly blogger photo upload thing. good thing i have common sense and some basic knowledge of html.) anyway, i have really been enjoying writing lately. writing in my last journal and this journal has been great. i write every night before i go to bed, whether its 2 pages or 14, 15 minutes or an hour, i write. this is also just a cool journal.

this my good friends, is an iced caramel macchiato. yum. this is my current addiction. it all began on sunday when the amusing girl from starbucks suggested it. it has served me well over the last 6 days. it may not look like much here but there is a small layer of caramel at the bottom and the sides originally had caramel on them. calorie filled, yes, but delicious none the less. my drink of choice may change within the next week, but at the moment i'm loving my trips to any coffee shop for this very drink. thank you starbucks girl from sunday.

now for a few observations and interesting moments from my day. actually i'm not sure they're that interesting, but mine none the less.

1. they make organic chocolate chip cookies. is that even possible? yes of course it is but here is what that means. everything that went into making that cookie was organic. if you follow that then you'll realize that even the chocolate is organic. is nothing safe from being organic anymore? i mean seriously, isn't the whole point of eating chocolate throwing all your cares away, and eating something that just tastes good? so, if you're going to eat it you may as well go the whole nine yards and eat the full on pesticide filled chocolate. (note: chocolate is yummy, and organic chocolate is probably not too bad. also, i don't know how much pesticides are used in the growing of ingredients that make regular chocolate.)

2. floyd landis is mennonite. i had no idea, and i think that it's totally cool. if you don't know who he is, well let me tell you . he is the current american favorite for winning the tour de france this summer. (if you don't know what the tour de france is, then please, find out or stop reading my blog.) anyway, he is the person of the week on ABCnews this week and they said that he is from lancaster, pa (i've actually been there), and talked about how his mom walks to a neighbors house to watch him ride every day. how totally cool is it that this mennonite kid grew up and is now hopefully going to win the tour de france.

okay... so that's basically it. aside from the fact that rumpole of the bailey is totally hilarious.

enjoying the fruits of summer.
- corrie

music.

i've been enjoying it lately. actually, i always enjoy it, but i've finally started enjoying some new stuff. i've gotten more music in the last 2 weeks than i did for the majority of the last year probably. and it's not just the same old bands and such, but new things too. last night before falling asleep i created a little play list that includes some of these new bands, with some classic songs that i always love. i'd now like to share it with you.

"good vibrations" the beach boys - the beach boys are classic summer music, and this is one of my favorite of their songs. the other two are "kokomo" and "woudn't it be nice", but they're not on this.

"good day sunshine" the beatles - another classic band, and a fun upbeat song. for a while the title was my headline on my myspace page. i feel like going on a bike ride along the beach and listen to this song then.

"please forgive me" david gray - i was trying to pick a new song for my myspace page, and didn't have any new bands that i wanted to put on, so i decided to go for an old favorite. while on david's page trying to decide what song to put on i listened to the lyrics of this one, and it all clicked for me. this is one of my favorite songs at the moment.

"tune out" the format - i just got this album, and this is a song that totally stood out for me. yesterday we took the middle & high school kids from church to six flags magic mountain, and i was singing the chorus to this song all day. i got a few funny looks, but i could have cared less.

"bonnie taylor shakedown 2k4" hellogoodbye - i went to warped tour last week and heard hellogoodbye play, then just the other night i decided to get some of their music. i'm really looking forward to the new album that will be coming out in august, but on their ep this is one of my favorite songs. i was singing this today around the kids i babysit, and sarah gave me this horrid look, like "what was i singing". i explained that it was a song lyric, and she rolled her eyes and was all "whatever." middle school age kids, sheeze.

"catch" leaves - this was the first song that i heard by this band, and it made me want to listen to more. while i was compiling this list this song just felt right to put on.

"ten days" missy higgins - she's awesome and i probably could have put any of her songs on, but this is one of my more favorite. also, i think it decently describes some dreams that i've been having lately. don't read too much into that.

"hotel song" regina spektor - i got her new album, and this is such a fantastic catchy song that i have to listen to it. i'd have to say that the beat is what really makes this song for me.

"i'll see that you aren't woken up" sherwood - i had to put ONE sherwood song on there, and chose this one. basically all of my music listening revolves around them right now, so something needed to be on this list. this song is the last song off their old ep, and is one of my favorite. the line that makes the song for me is "and it slows to just a trickle now/ but i wish that it was pouring out/ cause there's so much here to write about." love it. i think of it almost every night when i journal.

that is it. maybe later i'll put up pictures of things that are making me happy at the moment, aside from my music right now.

i have dreams of orca whales and owls.
- corrie

stupid.

why do i get my hopes up? i'm not sure. i try to have low expectations about things that i really want, or at least i say that i do. inside i hope for more though. why? i don't know. sometimes i wish that things could be in my timing. wouldn't that be nice? too bad it's not how it works. i know that good things are coming up for me, even though i don't know what they are yet. i'm being anxious and impatient. pushing for something that isn't ready to happen yet. i'm running out of things to say about this wall that i'm continually running into. i suppose that the real issue is that i can't let go. something so simple can be so difficult.

can i be patient long enough for the good to come?
- corrie

happily sunburned.

today was... well, beyond my expectations. in case you haven't been reading my blog every day (lots of post lately i know, and not like many people read this anyway) then i should really start by saying that today was the warped tour in ventura. in the past i have not gone, because no band i wanted to see was playing there. this year, however, was different. sherwood was playing, and, again, if you know me you know i love them. it was too great an opportunity to pass up seeing them in my hometown. an added bonus of today was that i didn't have to go alone. my friend lauren was planning on going, and so i called her up and we went together. i had a great time with her, even if they guy who was tagging along was a little too weird for me, and actually her too.

the tour was good. interesting to say the least. sherwood really made the day for me. if they weren't playing, it wouldn't have been worth it for me. i did however see a number of bands that i wouldn't have seen any other way. here's a small list (or at least what i can remember). the academy is, rise against, the pink spiders, joan jett and the blackhearts, against me, hellogoodbye (my second favorite probably), greeley estates, the plain white t's, saves the day (acoustic set), motion city soundtrack, underoath, and sherwood (of course). i'm sure that there were more. like i heard a little bit of scary kids scaring kids, and meg & dia. oh i also saw, oh shoot. i can't remember. it was two bands that played the ernie ball stage. oh well.

so, my expectations for today were to find sherwood's merch tent, and see them play. i accomplished both of those. i found the tent soon after arriving, and saw mikey and found out when and where they were playing. i was surprised that they weren't playing until 5 which meant that i had 5.5 hours to wait for them to come on. lauren and i walked around and listened to bands and such, and found jordan (weird guy, honestly) later and we all did stuff together. finally my time came where the band that i wanted to see was going to play. we went over to the tent, which was quite small, and hung out with the others while the band set up. once they started to play i ended up being in like the second row of people between dan and nate. good times. the set was awesome, even "the summer sends its love" which they may not totally agree with. it made me smile that's for sure. lauren and jordan had left early from sherwood's set to see thursday play, so once they were doing playing i just hung around. i ended up calling my parents and talking to them just outside the tent. the band has basically taken down all their stuff and i'm basically done on the phone, when dan walks over to me and makes some comment about a comment i'd just made on the phone. i end the call with my mom (i see her all the time), and talk with dan for a few minutes. it was a really nice conversation. we were walking in the same direction too, so we talked going that way, and eventually the conversation ended when i went to go watch hellogoodbye.

like i started with, today was... well, great! i did get sunburned, and have some funny lines on my face from my funny sunglasses, and i've now got a HORRIBLE farmers tan, after doing so well not to get one up to this point this summer.

i've gotta go now, cause i'm way tired, and am hoping to get to sleep before midnight tonight. we'll see about that. yay for sleep though.

sunburns suck but sherwood doesn't. (yes, i know that's lame.)
- corrie

i really don't know.

what to say that is. i mean, i do, but i don't. all at the same time. i hate it when that happens.

so, i'm coming to the realization more and more that i just work better after 10pm. tonight for example i hung out with natalie and megan and brutus (the dog) at the matthew's house and watched all i wanna do. if you haven't seen it, then you're really missing out. and if you have seen it, it's probably cause you've watched it with me. anyway, i didn't get home until almost 11, and now, after all day, i'm really motivated to do something. surprise surprise. it's really nothing new, but it amazes me everytime that it happens.

also, i got my hair cut today and i ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT! having short hair is wonderful. there is just something about it that i totally love. the best part of the whole thing was that it only took 20 minutes and cost $15. that's what happens when you go to the woman whose cut your hair since you were born (basically), and she does it out of her living room. i just wish that i could have dyed my hair again. i love having it that beautiful dark red color. too bad summer and being out in the sun lightens my hair, and i don't have the money to go to a place that does it at the moment. before i go back to school though for sure i'll get it done again.

so, tomorrow i am going to the warped tour, and not alone! i was planning on going alone and it's something that i totally don't mind doing, but it turns out that my friend who is home for the summer and i haven't hardly seen yet is going too, and is only going with this creepy stalker guy. i thought it was a good idea to call her and go together. it's so funny cause she totally doesn't seem the type to me to go to warped every year, but she does, and she loves it! she's so awesome. it'll be great spending some time with her tomorrow and, of course, seeing sherwood.

that's it really, and more than i had intended to say initially.

here's to fun times and cool people and getting my laundry somewhat done before 1am.
- corrie

random.

i feel like i had much more that i wanted to say, but most of it seems to have escaped me at the moment, so here are some random thoughts.

tomorrow is full moon, and i always look forward to that. it's just so beautiful and it's light fills everything. i like sitting in my truck in the driveway, with all the lights off, and have everything illuminated by it's light.

i got a new journal tonight. i finished my other one just last night and was uninspired by the blank ones i have lying around the house somewhere, so i made a special trip to barnes & noble just to get it. i was hoping to walk up and find the perfect one, and i did. it's a "quotablejournal" and i've never gotten one of those before. it's got a green cover that fades from bottom to top and has a quote from eleanor roosevelt on it. "yesterday is history tomorrow is mystery today is a gift." i love that quote. it embodies everything that i think my whole purpose of writing in a journal every night is. to record my own personal history.

if you don't journal you should. it's an amazingly freeing thing.

i wrote a card to send to my former roommate christine today. i'm very excited about it. it's a card that is totally different than anything i would actually send seriously to someone. it contains a little slip of paper that reads "surprise slut" and some of my favorite of christine's lines that i miss.

i listen to sherwood basically every day. what exactly i listen to changes, but today i listened to every song of their's that i have at least once. when i'm in my truck and driving i sing along as loudly as i please (with the music as loud as i please). each time today that i got in my truck and started singing along after only a few lines i had a moment where i could sing, but just smile and laugh cause i love their music so much. i would then proceed to sing more with that same smile on my face. i see them tuesday at warped, and i can't wait.

i'm not sure how i feel about going to the warped tour in general. i'm going to see sherwood, and check out a few other bands (but that's not my actual reason for going). warped as a whole is what i'm not sure about. i've always steered clear of it in the past, going "oh, today is the warped tour." i'm just not sure about the whole crowd thing there. we'll see how it goes.

after i write things here (and in my journal too i suppose, but less there) i sometimes feel like a total jerk. the way that i word things and what i talk about just don't always come across correct when read again. sure it seemed right at the time, but it doesn't always translate to later. then there are times when i mean everything that i say, nice or mean, and still occasionally feel like a jerk later. but not always. it's just better when i'm totally honest.

the tour de france is going on right now, and i love to watch it. i could usually care less about cycling, but there is just something about the tour that i love to watch. this is the third year i'll have watched it. it was a little more fun when lance was still racing, but not a whole lot. then it was "will he win another one?" and now it's "who's going to win now that he's gone?"

wow, for someone who didn't have much to say i think that i've done a good job of finding lots to say. that was far more than i anticipated in writing tonight.

feeling optimistic with a touch of something negative.
- corrie

bogey.

i love humphrey bogart. i do have to say that i haven't seen many of his films, but i wouldn't mind seeing more. my dad and i just got through watching the dark passage on tcm. the maltese falcon is on later too, and i just totally love that movie. it's one of those classic movies that my dad and i could watch again and again. that and stalag 17. now that's a great world war 2 movie. it's actually what the tv show hogan's heroes was based on. back to bogey, sabrina is also a favorite of mine of his.

this was a little lame, but something to say.

tired tired tired.
- corrie

stiked.

okay, so i'm in a very plesant mood, which is, dare i say it, plesant. here are some things that i'm currently enjoying/looking forward to.

1. tonight i watched take home chef on TLC, and i love that show. it's on every friday and it's hosted by one of my favorite tv chef personalities, curtis stone. he's australian and i first heard of him when he hosted surfing the menu, which aired a couple of summers ago in style. i just love him.

2. monday i'm getting my hair cut. it's been six and a half months since i last cut my hair, and it really needs it. i love having short hair and it's currently longer than it's been in the last 3-4 years. it touches my shoulders! shocking i know. it's going to be a simple (cheap) cut, but it'll get me throught the rest of summer. i do wish that i could die it too, but i'll have to wait to get that done until august. it's pointless in summer anyways. but how i do miss my dark red hair.

3. tuesday i'm going to the warped tour where sherwood will be playing. i love them, and am way excited to go and see them again. i wish there were more to say about it, cause i am way excited to go, but i just can't put it into words. the one thing that i can say is that I LOVE SHERWOOD. plain and simple.

stoked and psyched = stiked.
- corrie

oranges and minnie mouse ears.

i love to drive over bridges that are flanked by orchards of oranges. orange trees are beautiful all alone but an orchard of them is wonderful. my favorite time to drive over them is when they have been freshly topped. when you drive above them like that and you can't see the rows in which they are planted they look like grass and i feel like i could just walk across them. i've felt this way since i was a little kid, and that kind of thing will never leave me. i just hope that someday they will still be there.

how can my minnie mouse ears ever compete with their bikini's. figure it out.

reminiscing and doubting.
- corrie

nothing.

tomorrow i don't have anything to do. and i love the idea of that. it's been 3 weeks since i've had a day where i wasn't required to do anything, and i miss that dearly. the last couple of days have been good set up for the relaxing that is to come tomorrow, but it's a little weird at the same time. summer began with having nothing to do. i lounged all day, watching tv, surfing the internet, and doing some reading. then it began to get more and more busy until the last 3 weeks hit and i've been overloaded some days. between spending a week with middle schoolers at camp (which i love), then doing recreation with a bunch of 1st-5th graders (which i tolerated, mostly cause i was sick), and then throw in working my "real" job at the farm, plus doing things with friends and other things with family it's been crazy.

what oh what will i do with myself? i can guess.

i will sleep in, lounge around most of the day doing nothing, read a solid amount in any one of the three books that i am currently reading, maybe go out coffee or something (i bet liz'd wanna go), possibly go out to dinner with my parents and their friends (depending on where they go), and finally go see the new pirates of the caribbean with liz, josh, and others i'm sure. it's going to be lovely. i can't wait! and i better utilize it to it's fullest cause i work friday and saturday, then have all sorts of church stuff on sunday.

on a different note. last night i started going through some of my old pictures from the last year (mostly from school). we had so much fun in tenney basement from september to may. i'm glad it was well documented. i'm considering posting some of the more outrageous pictures that my friends would probably kill me for putting up, but i don't care because they rock. maybe tomorrow.

content with nothing.
- corrie

fireworks.

i love fireworks. i really really do. i have favorite fireworks. they are big and white and sparkle as they fade out. if they make a crackling noise, that makes them even better. screamers are great too.

before the fireworks started tonight, i was walking with my mom back to our area from hanging out talking with some friends for a few minutes and there was a girl in our way who had one of those huge bubble things and was making a bubble. we stopped for her, and when she realized that she was in her way she apologized. normally i wouldn't mention this but the kicker is what a replied to her. are you ready for it? i said "don't worry about it, we didn't want to burst your bubble." yep, it was so cheesy that i almost didn't say it but in the end couldn't resist.

on a final note, my aunt and uncle had their first child today! yep, i've got a baby cousin! (my only other cousin on my mom's side of the family.) her name is madeline elizabeth cruickshank and she is gorgeous. she was born prematurely ( at 27.5 weeks), so she's small (2lbs 4.5oz, 14in), and she's got a lot to get through before she's in the clear, but our hopes are high. when i saw her she was doing wonderfully. keep her in you thoughs and prayers over the next few weeks if you don't mind.

loving my new cousin & fireworks, and wishing for something more next july 4th.
- corrie

hot days.

okay, so i am way happy that i wrote that blog last night, but tonight i am far less emotional. i don't typically get that emotional, but last night was a special night.

today has been a good day, even the 5+ hour drive, and i'm still in a good mood. my mood was helped when i went with my mom to see the devil wears prada. i loved it. everyone in it was so good, and even though part of me wanted it to end a different way, it worked.

something that i've loved over the last few days has been the heat. okay, so during the day it stinks, but it's great in the evening. at 10:15 last night in lodi it was 70 degrees and it was fabulous. tonight here it was 65, but even that is okay.

right now i'm happy and that's a good thing. i really can't ask for more than that.

by the way, mel brooks is hillarious. i'm now watching high anxiety with my dad.

feeling really really good.
- corrie

the wedding.

okay, so, tonight i went to a wedding that i had mixed feelings about, and now i am so glad that i did. it was the wedding of one of my oldest friends ryan.

when i first heard last summer that he was engaged i thought he was crazy. he and i are the same age (actually he's exactly 5 months older than me), and i thought that he was way too young and when i heard their story i thought that it was way too rushed. i've not thought about it much over the last year (avoided it really), but when i have i have maintained the same attitude about it. that is until tonight.

when i got the invitation to the wedding i decided that i was going no matter what. even if my parents decided not to, i was going to drive up and back in one day if i had to. my mom decided to come (and she's glad that she did too), so we got a hotel room, which is where i am now.

starting today i decided that i'd be positive about this whole thing. i came to the realization that when i get married (eventually, hopefully) it could be under circumstances that were similar even if not more "rushed" or whatever, and i'd want those i love to be supportive of me too. so, i decided to be supportive of ryan and amanda in their choice to get married. and i'm so glad that i did.

it was crazy seeing ryan up there in front of everyone waiting for amanda to walk down the aisle, and i couldn't believe that this was they guy who i grew up with. at this point i was still uneasy, then jaclyn walked down the aisle crying (which made ryan cry), and then the wedding party and finally amanda, and as soon as i saw them together, i was sold. by the end of the ceremony i was so happy for them.

the reception was great, too. i sat with the family, who are basically my family, and jaclyn's friends eileen and geoff. they are hillarious and so much fun to be around. it's been a year since i've seen basically everyone in that family so it was great to see them again. (last summer was jaclyn's wedding.) like i said, they are my family, and i've missed seeing them so much.

so, by the end of the night i was so incredibly happy for ryan and amanda (and i finally met her!). everyone had started to take off and we decided that it was time to leave. jaclyn, jarom, eileen, and geoff were going out the same way that we came, so i didn't say goodbye to them yet, but when i said goodbye to ryan the last time was the hardest. i could have talked all night but when it came to saying goodbye to one of my oldest best friends all i could get out was that i was so happy for him. that was it. that was the only time that i almost cried. my eyes welled up with tears, and even now as i think back to that moment i'm on the brink of tears. i'm just so happy for them.

like i'm sure i've said already, tonight was awesome in more ways than one and i'm so glad, beyond words, that i went. jaclyn (hi!), i hope that you read this one. tell ryan to come and read it. hopefully someday it'll be me.

happy & thankful, and feeling like a cow for the end of my last entry.
- corrie

(i have a picture that i wanted to put here, but it won't come up. check out my myspace for it. myspace.com/yellowmoonlite)

malls.

so, after having not been to a mall since probably january i have gone to the mall (actually 3 malls) 4 times in 3 days. that is insane to me. i blame it on this wedding that i'm going to tomorrow in lodi (california's middle of nowhere). i needed an outfit, and not just any outfit, i want to look good. this is one of the few times that i am REALLY making an effort, not just throwing something together that's out of my closet. so, thursday i hit ventura's 'lovely' pacific view mall to start my preliminary shopping. i got a few things that i'm stoked on and the skirt that i'll be wearing tomorrow. (just a jeans skirt, but a new one cause my old one is too big.) then friday, mom and i went up to santa barbara to do some shopping. there i got a few more things and the top that i will be wearing tomorrow. (a pink tank top thing with a lace racerback back. a little hart to describe but cute none the less.) after both of these trips, and all that i really needed for the outfit, i was still missing a little sweater that would just make me more comfortable. so, in pursuit of that i hit the thousand oaks mall (appropriately titled "the oaks") after work today. the trip was lame and almost fruitless. i got a shirt that i'd wanted up in santa barbara, but they didn't have my size. later, to attempt to complete my wardrobe mission, i went back to our mall and found a sweater and a neckalce. i'm so glad to be done.

ugh... wow, i'm tired and ready to go to bed. this was a rather lame entry, unless you really care what i wear. but it was also lame that i went to 3 malls to get an outfit, and lame that i let myself do that over a silly outfit for a wedding that i'm uneasy about. yea, we'll see how this wedding goes. it may end up that the 5 and a half our drive (each way) is the best part. i'm not being optimistic about it. bad me, but whatever.

sick of malls.
- corrie